daddy's day

I feel like I have been in a bit of a blog writing funk lately. Braden had a rough week last week and hopefully it was just a little rough patch and he will bounce back. The interferon seems to be draining both physically and emotionally, but he is officially one quarter of the way done with treatment!! I am not sure if that is a good thing or bad thing. Nine more months sounds like a long time, but three months down is a milestone in my books!

Happy Father's Day! As a mother and wife I think one of the things that makes me the happiest is seeing Braden and Brynn together. The first question out of Brynn's mouth each morning is "Does Daddy have to go to work today?" I know I am not nearly as fun as Daddy! Two nights a week I head to work and I am not sure what goes on when I am gone, but they sure have a fun time! Since Braden's diagnosis it pulls at my heart strings even more when I watch them together.  Brynn has been the root of Braden's sadness, tears, worry and anxiety. I think he would tell you his greatest fear is not being here to see her grow up. Brynn brings so much happiness into this home and even during the most difficult days she always makes us smile and laugh. She was sitting between us on the couch the day we got that dreaded phone call. She has seen our raw emotions and been there with us through it all. She is also the best hand holder for every shot! She is Braden's reason to fight.

So...Happy Father's Day Braden!!! We love you!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

 

 

growing old

I realize that I haven't updated my blog in a few weeks and someone told me I was overdue! Sorry for the delay, but I guess no news is good news! Life has been moving right along. I don't know if Braden feels the same, as some of his days tend to stand still, but for the most part he is doing really well. Interferon is rough. I don't know how else to say it...it just sucks! He really does his best to push through it and tries to go about life as normal as he can. Extreme fatigue is probably at the top of the symptom list, followed by insomnia. He gets a little frustrated being wide awake at 3:00am when he feels so tired. Otherwise, he still has the body aches and feels flu-like at times but it thankfully doesn't happen as often as it use to.

This weekend we headed to my hometown, Pretty Prairie, to celebrate my Grandmother's 90th birthday. Wow! When I was thinking about her birthday and all she has lived through in her 90 years it got me thinking about a conversation Braden and I had a few weeks ago. We were talking about where we would be 10 years from now and at the same time we both said..."we will be in our forties!" Sorry if I offend anyone but geesh forty sounds old! Which was then followed with Braden saying..."I hope I am still here when we reach our forties." Whoa...talk about a statement hitting you like a freight train. Maybe some of you reading this can relate. I think those thoughts are probably very natural when you are diagnosed with cancer. Braden has had many weak moments where he has found himself talking about the future and the unknowns. He has talked about his hopes of being here for Brynn's first day of kindergarten, her school years, high school graduation, moving her to college, walking her down the aisle, our first granchild, and so on. So, as we celebrated my Grandma's birthday, I was thinking that growing old is a gift. Enjoy today. None of us are guaranteed tomorrow. Braden and I do have moments of fear and anxiety about this disease. Our lives are forever changed, but thankfully we are able to overcome those moments of fear because we have a God that is far greater than this disease!

So HAPPY 90th BIRTHDAY Grandma!!! Thank you for a fun weekend. I hope I can live a life as complete as the life you have lived. Love you!

Grandma with the great-grands!

 

 

Grandma and her boys

(My Dad is on her right and my Uncle on her left)

 

 

Great weekend enjoying the beautiful weather in my favorite little town!

 

These two little red-heads have so much fun together!

 

 

Make a wish!







blessed

We had such a fun weekend it was hard seeing it end. Brynn had her first dance recital this weekend and I was a proud mommy. She was so cute up there on that stage, it makes me smile every time I think about it! She brings so much happiness into this house. We are so blessed.  Braden and Brynn made Mother's Day extra special and we got to see both our mom's for awhile! That was fun!!

Today was back to reality and we got to go visit our friends at the Cancer Center. Braden has been feeling really good for the most part. He has his share of good and bad days, but I think the good outweigh the bad. He continues to battle the fatigue and sometimes he feels achy, but he has been back at work full time and tries to push through it. We laugh about his inability to stay awake as soon as he hits the couch in the evenings. Ha! He was frustrated with the numbers on the scale today as they continue to go down, but he is eating better and his appetitie is slowly improving. Dr. Reddy was really happy with how everything is going. His labs are holding steady and everything is going as it should. Nothing new to report.

We continue to feel so blessed by our wonderful friends and family who lift Braden up in prayer every day. And thank you to everyone who has done so many wonderful things for our family from meals, to gift cards, to yard work and garage sales!! I know this isn't even close to all the generous things others have done. We are just so thankful for all of the wonderful people we are surrounded by who make all of this a bit easier. Today I ask that you would also lift up a beautiful young mother and wife who I have connected with who is just starting her battle with melanoma. And pray for all of those affected by this disease. We are so fortunate to be connected to others going through this same journey. I pray that they are able to find peace and comfort as we have in you, God!!
He will give perfect peace to those who place their trust in him. Isaiah 26:3

Lastly, I just had to include a couple of pictures of my little ballerina!

Very typical picture of these two!

 

 

 

 

 

 

The fan club minus Grandpa Larry!

 

Melanoma Monday

Today is MELANOMA MONDAY! I am wearing my black for Braden! Did you know...

-Melanoma is the fastest growing cancer in the U.S.
-Melanoma is the most common type of cancer in young adults age 25-29.
-Most melanoma is curable in the early stages with an over 90% survival rate, but the most deadly form of skin cancer when found too late.
-Melanoma can develop anywhere on the body including eyes, hands, scalp, and feet.
-Exposure to tanning beds before the age of 35 increases a person's risk by 75%.
-Younger people who regularly use tanning beds are 8 times more likely to develop melanoma.
-Occasional tanning bed use triples your risk.
-The most dangerous aspect of melanoma is its ability to spread to other parts of the body-most often the brain, lungs, and liver.
-It takes only one blistering sunburn, especially at a young age, to more than double a person's chance of developing melanoma.
-In 2013, it is estimated that in the US there will be 70,230 new cases of melanoma. That means someone will be given a melanoma diagnosis every 8 minutes. Someone dies from melanoma every hour.
-Melanoma doesn't discriminate. It strikes men and women of all different ages, races, and skin tones. Bob Marley died of melanoma at the age of 36.

I can't emphasize enought the importance of regular skin checks! Unfortunatly, we didn't discover Braden's mole early enough and it had already spread to his lymph nodes. Don't be scared...just get checked. It could save your life!





is it worth it?

May is Melanoma Awareness Month! You had it on your calendar, right?!? I have been debating whether posting these pictures is appropriate, but then it occured to me that if I truly want to get my message out some people need to see this! Sometimes I get mad. Mostly it just makes me sad. Imagine seeing one of the people you love the very most sick. I often times think to myself how unfair this is. He didn't spend years in tanning beds. He didn't worship the sun. Yes, he was blessed with beautiful red hair, and he sure does love spending summers outdoors doing things that normal people do, but really? I don't know how many times he has said to me..."It's going to be ok. We will get through this." He picks me up when I am down. He is always the encourager. I admire his strength and courage. So...the next time you think about getting a beautiful tan, or you think that sunscreen is just not your thing, I hope you will think of Braden. He didn't think it would be him either.

Is your tan worth this?

The scar on his back is where the primary site was. Under his arm is where lymph nodes were removed. This picture was after surgery #2.

 

Dr. visit, lab, treatment, repeat...

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This picture makes me sad. One of his lowest points during high dose. It hurt to see him feeling so terrible.

 

Three times a week for 11 months...any takers?

 

 

 

My hero and best friend...love him!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

going strong

Hey, it's Braden here.  The second best blogger in the family!  I know, you were expecting a post from Andrea...sorry!  Andrea asked me to post an update on how I'm doing now that the high-dose phase is over and I'm on to the injections.  121 more to go to be exact...uggghhh!  I started the shots last week, and so far the side effects have been minimal in comparison to high-dose.  I still get the aches and chills a few hours after the shot ,and sometimes feel achy the next day, but it's nothing like what I felt like during the four weeks of high-dose.  High-dose was in a word...HELL.  It has been nice to get back to somewhat of a normal routine...Going back to work and actually feeling like a productive member of society.  My appetite is back and I've eaten like a horse the past couple of weeks.  Trying to put the weight back on that I lost during high-dose.  My pants don't fit right and it drives me nuts!  Oh yeah, and it has been great being able to drink a beer once in a while!  And I have to mention Andrea in this post.  It's an absolute blessing being married to a nurse...She knows how to give a good shot!  Is there such thing?  Seriously though, she has been my rock through all of this.  When she says we're in this together, she really means it.  And I don't know where we would be without our faith in God.  He gets us through, one day at a time.  Thank you all so much for the continued prayers and support, it truly means a lot!  Have a great weekend!

                                                            The "stuff"

 

 

This little person makes every day better!

 



new normal

Braden had a really good week off of treatment. His blood counts are back up and he has been able to spend time at the office and catch up with a few things around the house. His appetite has been getting better each day, and slowly he is starting to feel more like himself. We are thankful for that! I know it is hard for him to think about starting again for 11 more months, but we are taking it one day at a time and praying this phase of treatment is a little easier. He will start up again this week with injections (at home) three days a week. It has been nice feeling a bit more "normal" this past week. Each day gets easier and melanoma doesn't seem to be the main topic around our house like it has been the past few months. Life goes on. I visited with a stranger last week who told me that our life will never be the same, but someday I will thank God for these circumstances in my life. She said I probably won't understand it now, but someday I will. I am sure I don't completely understand her statement, but I do find myself catching glimpses of the good. God's beauty is everywhere...even in this ugly situation. Our life will never be the same. I know this is true. For me, I think that even in the midst of fear, worry, doubt about what the future could bring, and just the craziness of life these days, I am learning to live in each moment. This has been something I have struggled with and continue to work on. Even after I have been up at work all night long barely able to keep my eyes open, trying to be the best mommy to Brynn, trying to keep up with the day to day things at home, and trying to be with Braden for each appointment, lab draw, infusion,etc... I am trying to thank God. Thank you for these people I love so much, thank you for this day, this home, this job, this treatment. Thank you.  Slowly life is falling back into a "new normal" for us.  We thank you all for faithfully praying for Braden and I thank you for the encouragement as I put myself out there with this blog. I never really thought of this as my type of thing, but I have found that it is good therapy. I recently read this and felt like it was a good reminder for all of us:  "Be careful not to complain about anything, even the weather, since I am the Author of your circumstances. The best way to handle unwanted situations is to thank Me for them. This act of faith frees you from resentment and frees Me to work My ways into the situation, so that good emerges from it." -Jesus Calling Sarah Young.