change of plans

Finally fall! After a rough summer we have been anxiously awaiting fall. We have been looking forward to another season down and getting closer to the half-way point which thankfully came and went. I feel like we have been moving along on cruise control this month. Until today. Braden had a routine eye exam last week and unfortunately they found spots on Braden's eyes caused by poor circulation and small hemorrhages. They are certain this is caused by the interferon. Dr. Reddy and Braden discussed this on the phone today and treatment has been put on hold for now. We meet with Dr. Reddy in a couple weeks to discuss everything in more detail, but as of now, the risk of more damage to Braden's eyes is too great to continue. Braden will have his eyes rechecked in 8 weeks to see if the spots are improving. Although they can't guarantee this won't cause permanent damage, they feel his eyes will eventually heal. I have so many different emotions. Obviously, Braden needs this treatment and it is a little disheartening feeling like we are no longer going to be "doing anything" to prevent a recurrence of this ugly disease. Dr. Reddy was very reassuring that from a melanoma standpoint the MOST important part of treatment was the first 4 weeks of high dose treatment. He is very happy Braden has made it 6 months on this rough stuff. So for now we just wait...and pray. 

Tonight I was laying with Brynn and I was thinking about the fear in my head. It occurred to me that although Braden is taking time off from treatment, we are still doing the MOST important thing we can be doing for Braden...PRAYING. It is far more powerful than any medication a doctor can give. Today I opened up my Jesus Calling book to a devotion I frequently go back to. I first read this a couple days after Braden was diagnosed and it has brought me so much comfort.

"My face is shining upon you, beaming out Peace that transcends understanding. You are surrounded by a sea of problems, but you are face to face with Me, your Peace. As long as you focus on Me, you are safe. If you gaze too long at the myriad of problems around you, you will sink under the weight of your burdens. When you start to sink, simply call out "Help me, Jesus!" and I will lift you up. 

 

The closer you live to Me, the safer you are. Circumstances around you are undulating and there are treacherous-looking waves in the distance. Fix your eyes on Me, the One who never changes. By the time those waves reach you, they will have shrunk to proportions of My design. I am always beside you, helping you face today's waves. The future is a phantom, seeking to spook you. Laugh at the future. Stay close to me."  

 

 

We are planning on making the most of this little break and enjoying this season! I have been begging God to hurry this year along, but Braden and I have so much to enjoy despite these circumstances. God is carrying my burdens. How awesome is that? I will continually give it over to him. 

milestones

Feeling so blessed tonight to be surrounded by such great friends and family.  This week marks a couple of milestones for me.  The first being that I have reached the half way point of my treatment, and the second is my six month chest x-ray came back clean, NED (NO EVIDENCE OF DISEASE)!!  So with the good news, Andrea decided to surprise me with a last minute party!  Andrea and I feel so fortunate to have so many awesome people in our lives.  As for how I’ve been feeling- The past few weeks have been great.  The week off from the shots was a nice break and a chance for my body to recover.  As always, thank you all so much for your thoughts and prayers! God is good all the time!
-Braden

 

Thanks for the cake(s) Alicia!!! ;)

 

 

Hannah ready to party for Uncle B!

 

 

 

Love these girls!!

Some of the greatest friends in the world!!

 

 

And greatest neighbors in the world!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Thanks for keeping us laughing, Angie!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

cabin life

Our vacation came and went way too fast! We had the most wonderful week with my parents at their beautiful cabin in Colorado. My little sister Ashley came along also and we had the best time. It was a great get-a-way! This trip was extra special because we celebrated my Dad's 60th birthday while we were there. Brynn also got to experience her first (but not last) trip over Engineer and Cinnamon Pass. She was such a trooper as we spent a LOT of time on the trails. She loved being on the 4-wheeler! We also saw a black bear running through an open meadow one afternoon while we were out riding. It was quite an adrenaline rush...hence my lack of pictures to prove it! Like always, we made lots of new memories. Leaving the cabin is never fun. We can't wait to make it back! 

Braden hasn't had a shot in over a week now and he is feeling better and better each day. His appetite has increased, his body aches are gone and the fatigue is improving. Tomorrow it is back to reality as he starts up again. I know he is not looking forward to it, but I think this break was refreshing and he has renewed energy to keep fighting. We are nearing the half-way point! Knowing we are almost over the hump is a great feeling.

"I lift my eyes up to the hills, where does my help come from? My help comes from the Lord, the Maker of heaven and earth. He will not let your foot slip. He who watches over you will not slumber." Psalm 121: 1-3

Ready to go!

 

 

The crew

 

 

Moose and baby moose

 

 

 

 

 

Dad and Mom trying to find shelter in the hail storm! Ouch!!

 

 

 

 

 

On top of the world!

 

 

Happy Birthday Dad!! We celebrated with great Colorado neighbors and friends!

 

 

Meet Lucy...Brynn's new friend who came to visit most days in hopes of a good snack!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Brynn and Papa

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 



 

A week off? Yes, please!!

Braden had a routine appointment with Dr. Reddy today and I am very happy to report that he has a week off from his shots coming up!! He is so ready for a break and I am praying that he feels really good while we are on vacation. The countdown is on! We plan on doing a lot of eating, relaxing, eating, maybe some fishing, eating, hopefully some jeeping, and did I mention EATING?!? Dr. Reddy's only concern today was his weight loss and he wanted to decrease his dose but Braden said no way, so he has 4 weeks to put on a few pounds or Dr. Reddy is doing a dose reduction. Eating is becoming a job and I feel like the really mean boss!

On a side note, I just wanted to say how much I love getting messages from people saying they visited a dermatologist for a skin check! I also want to say how much I dislike hearing people talk about their summer tans or sunburns. If you have been reading my blog you know my stance on sun protection. You also know how strongly I feel about visiting a dermatologist. Sometimes ignorance is bliss, but in this case it definitely isn't! Tonight we were sitting at the dinner table and out of the blue Braden said to me, "Did you ever think that this would be our life now? Sometimes I have to pinch myself.. and not in a good way."  Discussing future scans, worrying about the chance of metastasis, dealing with side effects of treatment, and living with the anxiety and fear this diagnosis brings. From the very beginning we have hoped and prayed that somehow we could make a difference. That others would know melanoma isn't just "skin cancer."  I have seen this video several times and each time it brings me to tears. Hillary was also a stage 3b melanoma warrior, just like Braden. Sadly, her battle ended in October of last year, but her wish was just like ours. Spread awareness and find a cure...

http://youtu.be/_-4gPEmBINU

feeling thankful

July is almost over! We are really ok with that. Usually I am begging time to slow down. Brynn is growing too fast. In fact, we visited her preschool today. As we drove away she said, "Mommy, when are we going back? Next time you don't need to stay with me." It made me quite sad, but 2013...you have permission to keep moving full steam ahead! We are coming up on the end of 5 months into treatment. Braden is tired and worn out, but not giving up! He wakes up each morning with a pillow covered in hair. His beautiful thick red locks are getting thin. He still has plenty to spare, but Brynn says, "Daddy, you will look really silly with no hair!" Oh she keeps us smiling. In a few weeks we get away for a few days and we're keeping our fingers crossed we get to leave the needles at home with permission from Dr. Reddy. We shall see...  The house is quiet, my loves are tucked in, and I am feeling so thankful for all I have. Please God, continue to be with Braden as he perseveres. He is so strong and courageous. Be with him as he faces this battle and all that comes with it. Thank you for giving me him. One of my greatest blessings!



benefit for braden

What a weekend we had! Thursday evening we headed to Pretty Prairie and spent the entire weekend enjoying time with family and friends. It was a nice break for Braden to get out of town and lay on a different couch for a few days. Unfortunately, he hasn't been feeling the greatest, but the change of scenery was nice! Friday evening we enjoyed Kansas' Largest Night Rodeo with my family and Saturday was the benefit for Braden at Ubuntu. I have been thinking about what I wanted to say here on my blog and I feel like the words aren't coming. It's hard to adequately express the way my heart feels! I feel like I over-use the word blessed, but I feel like my heart could burst it is so very full. Liz, Therese, Karin, Russell, Dewy, Joyce, Mr. and Mrs. Clark, Taylor, Tannon and their cousin Taylor, and the Calvary Chapel Praise Band... you all are angels. Crazy that many of these people I had never met until Saturday! They worked so hard and served around 300 people. I know I am probably missing people who played a part in the benefit and to everyone who came and ate some of the delicious Indian Tacos, thank you from the bottom of our hearts. This road has not been easy, but people like you make it so much easier for us. This really is what Ubuntu is about and I know that what they did for my family is only the start of all the wonderful things to come for the community!

I know I haven't updated on Braden in awhile. We are over 4 months into treatment and I feel like Braden has done fantastic! I would like to ask everyone who is faithfully praying for Braden to please continue as he is dealing with some different things, some of which change on a daily basis. Lately it seems as if the good days are few and far between as he has been battling the aches, the poor appetitie, the fatigue, and trying to deal with the emotional toll it is playing. Unfortunately this is all to be expected and he amazes me every day by his ability to fight through it while trying to work full time and be a great daddy and husband. Your prayers are felt and we are so thankful for them. I have said this before, but without our faith we would be lost. We serve an awesome God!! He continually shows us his blessings!  Psalm 28:7 The Lord is my strength and my shield; my heart trusts in him, and he helps me. My heart leaps for joy, and with my song I praise him.  

Brynn loved the rodeo!

 

 

Therese and Liz...they worked so hard for Ubuntu's open house and the benefit!!

 

 

Brynn had a good time shopping at Ubuntu!

 

 

I love these kids so much!!

When life gives you lemons...

 

 

The delicious and adorable cupcakes Heidi made for the grand-opening!

 

 

 

 

 

Calvary Chapel Praise Band

 

 

 

 

 

Indian Taco's to go!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Brynn and Reese were busy shopping!

 

 

Hannah's first trip to Pretty Prairie and enjoying some cousin time!

 

 

These ladies will forever hold a special place in my heart!!

 

 

 

 Shop Sharing the generosity that keeps it running...

http://www.hutchnews.com/Localregional/Ubuntu-update-fundraiser--1

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

UBUNTU

Most everyone who knows me knows that I am a small town girl. I love my hometown. Pretty Prairie is a wonderful little place! When I married Braden I knew I was giving up my hopes of moving back to my hometown to raise my family...he was defnitely worth it, but to me Pretty Prairie will always be my home.  One week out of every year my little town comes to life during Kansas' Largest Night Rodeo. But actually this town is full of life all year long!

A few months ago a few local women had a vision of opening a thrift store in Pretty Prairie that would benefit the community. The vision has become a reality thanks to donated supplies, time, labor and even a donated building to use temporarily. Through this vision they will be able to put money back into our community- the Prairie Sunset home for seniors, the schools, our local civic theatre and food bank just to name a few. The name given to this destination thrift store:

UBUNTU: "I am because we are."   

 

Ubuntu is an African word that means humanity to others. Compassion, community, caring for others, and selflessness. These are just a few words to describe Ubuntu, and also my town. Liz Shepherd who is a co-founder of Ubuntu said "...it's essentially an expression of community, of looking out for all rather than just yourself." And indeed this is what those at Ubuntu are doing! A few weeks ago I received an email and it immediately brought me to tears. A benefit for my husband and family. I was asked by Ubuntu to post the flyer on my blog. It feels a bit awkward posting a flyer for my own fundraiser on here, but I want to share what this wonderful community is doing for us. God has blessed Braden and I in more ways than we could have ever imagined. I am humbled. This is my community.

 

 

 

BRADEN BOTTENBERG

                  ( Husband of Andrea Strohl Bottenberg, who is fighting Melanoma)

    

 INDIAN TACO FUNDRAISER @

 

                                                 UBUNTU

                                   A Thrift and Re-purposing Store

   

115 W.Main, Pretty Prairie, KS

  
Rodeo Saturday : July 20

                          

10:30am - until you quit eating

 
Donations will be used to help Braden with his medical bills.

 

 

 

 

Bring your entire family. Eat, Shop,Give!

  Ubuntu – Humanity to Others

 

For more information : Therese @ 620-960-5293 or Liz @ 620-727-4771

 

We would like to say a HUGE thank you to Karin and Russell Allen for the generous donation of food and preparation to make this event happen.

 

You can visit Ubuntu's website at:  http://ubuntustore.wix.com/Ubuntu